Archive for April, 2007


Binary Freedom

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Well it looks like my infatuation with free usenet services provided by my ISP has been diminished somewhat. Although I still have access to Internode’s Usenet News Service, I will no longer be able to abuse the bandwidth that I’ve become so accustomed to abusing, however, is this really cause for complaint? Perhaps a level of disappointment and sadness or even grief is expected, brought about by a decision to limit the rate by which one can infringe the copyright of the entertainment autocracy, but the sky isn’t about to fall, the heavens are still intact as far as I can tell and there are still are many many more gigabytes of data I can access regardless of freebies. So the level of disappointment can only be proportional to the loss and there is really no loss in potential. Besides you get what you pay for and considering it is a free add on service, it’s of little consequence if it takes 11 hours to download a file or a mere 2 hours.

Time is once again leering at us with its dominance, directing our attention to the knowledge that it awaits for no man nor will it be confined into binary code. Code which seemingly desires to be served upon a magnetised platter, enticing a would be feaster to quench his insatiable and ravenous hunger with a smörgåsbord of intellectual property. As with all abuse, once the cat has been let out of the bag and the crimes have been revealed, the authorities are liable to step in and take action. Once the wheels of the bureaucratic machine are set in motion, the innocent have nowhere left to hide.

Like Kafka’s Joseph K, the right to exist and operate within a freedom that is sold to the consumer in much the same way junk is sold to the junkie, is compounded by the need to understand the law by which the bureaucracy is ultimately in charge of. The process of determining one’s existential right becomes intermingled in an endless battle to reconcile freedom with law and it will almost certainly be an exercise in futility, only because the bureaucracy will hide underneath the law it has created and remain forever out of reach. So the absurd man will arise in light of morning, only to find a new law or legislation and then once again be confined by an inaccessible freedom.

Category : Rants | Blog

untitled inspiration

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I’m staring blankly at my keyboard hoping for some inspiration to sweep from the aether, however the gods remain silent and I’m left, for better or worse, to my own resources. The weekend has come and gone and while I hold onto the last breath it has left to breathe, I waste it by forcing some vision that will not come. Last night was the night for visionary experience but tonight I am left strangely calm, without the usual mania which accompanies my Sunday nights. If I’m to be entirely honest, I’d have to admit that most nights twitch my mind with some sort of preoccupation and it isn’t unusual that such introspection and meditation will for the most part be born of fear. My mind fails me tonight and it could be a sign that I’m cured of all the fears and insecurities which I possess, however I know that it will be only a matter of time before the seeds of doubt ignite into a fiery amass of negativity. Unfortunate as is is, it will eventually manifest itself into this sphere; much to the dismay of whoever stumbles into this void.

Category : Rants | Blog

Tripping on Time!

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Time is one of these things you either love or you hate, there seems to be no middle ground when it comes to time. Right now and over the last year, time has been an adversary that has been and is unrelenting in its patience. Somehow I feel as though I’ve been taken hostage by this unforgiving foe. I may be someone who complains a lot about small things, but I don’t think having to relinquish my personal space is any small feat. I do possess an endurance to withstand these little nuances that add up into great big ordeals, however to have the perpetual sands of time trickle away something loosely defined as my freedom, is something all together different. What I’m talking about, is that I’ve had my Dad come and live with me for what seems like an eternity and I’ve endured this living arrangement for way too long. I want my space back. I want my life back. I don’t want to have to be a slave anymore to this man who is my dad. I could be derided for something which seems trivial but to me this is not a trivial matter. I hurt everyday that this man is in close proximity to me and I have every right to feel this hurt. I don’t believe anyone really wants to listen to this outrage and silent despair so I’ll write about it, at least the page staring back me will have no objections if I vent.

I recently read a book recommended to me, called “The Body Never Lies” by Alice miller and in the book she outlined a philosophy where she expressed her view that we don’t have to follow a morality of “Honour thy Mother and Father”. It has stirred my thoughts about the reasons why I entered into this agreement with my dad, to have him live with me while he works Sydney. The reason falls exactly into this category of fourth commandment morality that has been instilled in us since childhood whether we are Christians or not. Society has deemed it appropriate and “good” to respect and honour thy parents. My lack of self respect drove me to this deception of altruistic ideology and I deeply regret not having the good sense to make a decision based on my needs rather the needs of my dad.

Alice Miller described in her book about the need to be allowed to express the negative emotions that lurk behind the exterior of self deception which demands that we forgive the sins of our parents in order to be able to move on. I was under the impression that this methodology was in fact correct, the tried and true method, however I have come to understand that it is not possible to forgive. I am not readily able to let bygones be bygones simply because it is the “good” thing to do. I have tried by letting him live under the same roof as me but it is a doomed venture. I simply do not have the capacity to be able to forget what my body is telling me and it speaks every time I cringe and feel anxiety and fear around the tyranny of a wish that desires that the past be forgotten and rewritten into a fairytale of unconditional love and acceptance. It works on a two way street, what I want I can’t really have. My hurt is there and it will always be there because I delude myself with the notion that I will have a relationship with my dad that is on an equal footing and is consistent with freedom of communication, something which I recognise now as something that can never exist

So I trip on time waiting. I wait two more months while the clock beats its pulse. tick. tock. tick. tock. Awaiting time when it will allow me my freedom. As I wait, the present shadows the motion of day and night and my only hope is for the cycles of light and dark to pass quickly so I can then, at the very least feel safe again. Hopefully this wish will become reality but wishes are things that can easily be quashed with a few words like “they’ve extended my contract for two more months” *cringe*

Category : Journal | Blog

My Dying Bride – Paradiso Main Hall

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Category : Sight and Sound | Blog

Okay I’ve made the switch into a new sphere in what can only be described as a weblog addiction. I’ve taken the plunge and got a domain and web host to play around with. My previous blogging experience with Blogger (TwistedTripper’s Abyss) was a fruitful venture in the sense that I posted a few rants in the year or so that I’ve had it up and running but I thought it was time I advanced the experience with my own little place in the world wide web.

Hopefully I’ll be able to enhance the feel of this new look blog and get a new website up also.

I’ve been playing around with this damn blog all day and I’m still none the wiser in how to customise WordPress to any great extent. It’s gonna be a long suffering journey and one that you will probably not want to bear witness to, however if I want my fifteen minutes of fame then I’d best stop fooling around with themes and start writing so that you can start reading (well that’s the fantasy anyway).

Anzac Day has just vanished on me and I’ve done nothing but be glued to a computer screen.  I’ve probably done nothing here to stir the interests of anyone reading this tripe but once I get things sorted I’ll begin this journey into unraveling the nightmare that my reality often entails. Well I exagerate and distort things a little but I need some sort of identity and the nightmare is TwistedTripper.

Category : Rants | Blog

PM Howard skates on thin ice!

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Prime Minister John Howard has announced the federal government’s plans to inject a further 150 million dollars into the war on drugs, in particular to fight against what the media has coined as the “ice epidemic”. It seems rather odd that the PM would say that he is proud of his zero tolerance approach to the drug problem when almost 75 percent of this new funding will be directed towards the addiction treatment industry and a mere 40 million to be allocated to law enforcement. It would seem that Howard has fingers in all pies when he attempts to placate the masses with rhetoric about what is essentially a highly emotive social disorder. It is also amusing that Howard takes possession of the falling heroin overdoses, which is somehow a reflection on his government’s tough on drugs stance. It is clearly a result of Asian crime syndicates moving away from the poppy fields into the more profitable business of amphetamine manufacture and distribution. I guess all the Howard government’s rhetoric is just a ploy to gain votes in an election year.

I personally would rather see the funding going into research, only because the treatment of addiction is statistically an abysmal proposition. At best what we as a community can hope for, is a 10 to 15 percent success rate out of any treatment method and those figures are highly optimistic. If we are to fund the treatment of addictive disorders then I’d like to see the a good proportion of this funding in alternate approaches to addiction treatment, alternatives like SMART Recovery. The mental health services, which is the front line is in the battle with crystal Methamphetamine could do with a significant boost from this allotted election bribe as the most dangerous affect of amphetamine use is psychosis. It would be a pity and seem like a waste of funds if the greater proportion of 80 million dollars were only available to prop up existing rehabilitation centres that are affiliated with traditional 12 Step therapy which is arguably non treatment. We’d be fooling ourselves if we believe that a system that coerces substances abusers into treatment programs that promote 12 Step philosophy as the only way to treat addictive disorders will benefit the community in a significant way. Some not so favourable insights into into the effectiveness of 12 Step treatment can be found in the Orange Papers, it is compelling reading for anyone interested in the treatment of addiction. Wasting funding on drug diversion programs such the drug court is in my opinion tax dollars going down the drain. No one can force a person into sobriety so sending criminals to rehab is not going to have any significant impact on the successful treatment outcomes of these individuals.

It is an ineffectual use of resources that could be better spent in the long term on developing policy that decriminalises substance abuse and promotes real education rather than half baked educative programs that depict some misinformed sensationalist message aimed at political votes rather than useful information on harm reduction and prevention. Spending more money in social services and mental health will be a better instrument in fighting addiction rather than passing the buck into a no responsibility hands in the air rehabilitation system that has essentially no better outcomes than no treatment at all.

I can see why the government is happy with their system, it is a system that requires a minimalist expenditure in a short sighted vision. If the addicts are passed into a system that perpetuates for the most part 12 Step self help and away from relatively expensive professional therapy the costs seem an advantage. Voters aren’t going to be happy if the government supports a program of professional help for what the community at large sees as a moral failing. However the costs are a misleading when one considers the high relapse rates of addicts and consequential hospital admissions with further detoxes and rehabs and damage that relapses often incur. Ultimately the tax payer dishes out for these failures and it is swept under the cover of yet more treatment through coercion.

The cost adds up and it may be time that we voters seriously began to look a little deeper than an added 150 million dollars.

Category : Uncategorized | Blog


Posted by Comments Off on Hypocrisy

There’s something strangely appalling when one enters into the halls of hypocrisy and is then outraged that another could be exhibiting a behaviour that they themselves are not above. I am speaking in terms of family and it never ceases to amaze me; the dynamics that are present in dysfunctional relationships. My dad was having a go at my brother, which was somehow directed at me for some unbeknown reason and he was somewhat upset at my brother’s alleged state of well lets just say inebriation. I couldn’t help but think that this is a case of the kettle calling the pot black. I really don’t understand why it is such devastating news that my brother would be in a incoherent frame of mind. Its not like anything will be vastly different because my dad hasn’t talked with him for a while. It’s unlikely reality will shift into a more pleasing form because you’ve buried your head in the sand for a period of hibernation. Reality would suggest that my brother likes to be in an altered mind set and it isn’t likely to change because I or anybody else would desire it to be different.

Anyway, if one is to throw stones then it would be wise if one didn’t do so inside a glass cocoon of self righteousness. I would’ve liked to have informed my dad of this ism but what is the point? Dysfunction exists for a reason and who I am to shatter the illusions of self righteousness and contempt. I only have one more week to contend with the dilemma I face with having my dad stay with me and it will be wise to keep my mouth shut. I don’t particularly want to be the one throwing stones even if I have a distinct advantage of not living in a glass house. Of course my dad may stumble upon this post and he may even be a little belligerent but this is my space to rant and indulge my little secrets and in a smug sense of relief it isn’t I that has some dirt that needs sweeping under the carpet whilst pointing fingers at someone else.

Category : Uncategorized | Blog

Shameless Self!

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Addictive behaviour has turned me away from techno lust into more selfish pursuits in a bid to win favour amongst you, my reader. I’ve committed myself to world dominion and have designs on having my rants spread like a malicious infection in a binary world already filled with virulent gossiping and marketing of penis enlargements. All I ask is to be heard amongst the rabble of distraction, porn and information. Perhaps my rants are inferior to those of professional bloggers. I’d be willing to sell myself out for a pay cheque, if that’s what it takes to have a voice heard. I’d even be willing to write about Britney Spears and her latest rehab romance.

Hang on a second, just one damn second!

That is taking things too far. I’d refuse to write about such transparent self promotion. Oh my God! Britney’s in rehab. So fucking what! I’d sooner rather see her committed inside the an endless treatment program in some public hospital detox (at least the television would be free to air some useful information) rather than having to see her exploits at marketing her latest hair cut. This is old news but no doubt it will infest our airwaves again with more 12 step promotion with Britney Spears as poster girl for pseudo spirituality.

Anyway I am yet to acquire the discography of Skepticism. Red Eye Records emailed me and informed me that the discs are no longer in print and their worldwide database is incorrect. I have to give them credit just for the fact that they wrote to me explaining why my order had been canceled. So much for going legitimate, I’ve enrolled Amazon to service a one last quest to get the the CD’s and if that fails then I can safely say that I did try the road to support the artist. I’ll confess that channel BT has aided my enthusiasm for this band and I would really like to show my appreciation to them by buying their albums. They are a finnish doom metal band, and my lineage is from that northern sphere, in the forests of 1000 lakes, the snow, the ice and dark winter months of frigid cold. Hopefully Amazon will pull through so I can then enjoy the macabre darkness of brooding seductiveness that are Skepticism’s songs.

In a self induced shameless desire I’ve joined forces with Technorati to promote this little space on the web but perhaps all I am naively doing is promoting Technorati. I’ve even joined MySpace, initially just so I could view someone else’s pics but am now musing with the idea that maybe I really need a MySpace too. More shameless self promotion to coincide with the my gregarious need to belong and be loved by the whole of humanity.

Edit: I’ve just canceled the MySpace thing because it is lame and I’d rather do my own website than support a Rupert Murdoch enterprise. I only wanted to view some links on someone else’s myspace but it was way too much hassle to even do that.

Category : Uncategorized | Blog

As Darkness Falls

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I was sent a link from a friend today to sample his involvement in a new metal/hardcore outfit here in Sydney, As Darkness Falls. I have to say I was impressed with the demo’s available on their myspace site. The vocalist Adam is a friend of mine and I wish him well in his efforts to brutalise Sydney with his harrowing growls combined with the hard hitting drumwork and breaks of the band.

Check em out

Category : Uncategorized | Blog

DRM and the ISP

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It was only last night I that I reflected on being branded with the mark of DRM and as I awoke this morning the headlines on ABC News Online broadcast this;

Music industry pushes ISPs for action on illegal downloads

The Australian music industry has approached Internet service providers (ISP) to penalise people who illegally download music.

Under the plan, record labels would identify Internet customers who are illegally downloading and service providers would give them three warnings before cutting off their phone and Internet connections.

The full story can be found at

This reeks of what I believe was a previous Telstra proposition to packet sniff our connections, to have a peek at what we are downloading and to then prioritise bandwidth so that P2P apps are essentially cut out of the equation. I think according to Telstra, torrents are only used to download illegal material and that we are guilty for just using a Bit Torrent client. Now the “Australian Music Industry” wants to cut our “phone and internet connections” if we are caught downloading illegal content. This no breaking news and it is already loosely done, although I don’t know if anyone has ever had their internet connection terminated because of it and if they were threatened to be cut off, then it was simply a matter of churning to another ISP.

The Music Industry already tracks downloaders of illegal content. They essentially join a swarm and identify the ISP’s associated with an IP address downloading and uploading particular files and then send cease and desist letters or copyright infringement notices to the ISP’s who own the IP addresses, who then pass the infringement notice onto the consumer who has that IP address at the time of alleged unscrupulous activity . However, now the Music Industry is embarking upon a crusade to deploy Internet Service Providers as the conformity enforcers of a solution to what is essentially their problem and to top it off they want ISP’s to act as morality police for a failure on their part to stamp out file sharing and piracy.

The ABC article states that ”

Ms Heindl says several smaller Internet providers have already expressed support for the plan” and I can’t help but be suspicious of the motives behind targeting smaller ISP’s who would be only too keen on deploying measures to protect bandwidth that is precious to their survival due to some flaw in their business model. I wouldn’t put it past the big name players like Telstra and Optus to use whatever excuse to prevent bandwidth exploitation from torrents and other file sharing apps so that their bottom line can be further expanded by whatever totalitarian methods they see fit.

There is something wrong with the system if the big guns in society are reduced to litigating against some teenager downloading a few measly songs off the internet. The idea of maximising the profit margins to finance the bonuses of music industry executives is where the whole system is flawed, so that some fat cat can maintain an ever increasing quest for power and a lifestyle to match. The solution to piracy that we are being sold is to live in a police state, where the moral police are internet service providers and the thought police are tied to the courts so that some sorry arsed geek, cops a termination of his telecommunications or ends up being sued for some breach of copyright, is absurd.

The problem can be fixed without such draconian measures, we just have to think outside the square. Surely the music industry can come up some scheme where there profits can be maximised using the technology that the consumer is using. Nowhere in history has prohibition ever worked so to think that threatening an online community with dire consequences is bound to be a futile endeavour. Surely the music and movie industries have to realise that the price they are charging and the limitations of digital rights management they are imposing are the culprits in this failure to enforce copyright. Online piracy is only one part of a bigger system of piracy represented by racketeers overseas where hard copy piracy runs rampant, with little word from the industries about taking actions to police such organised disregard for executives pay cheques.

This whole anti piracy campaign will ultimately fail because technology will always be one step ahead of what the bureaucracy is capable of enforcing.

Category : Uncategorized | Blog