Archive for March, 2009


Prophecy or Fear Mongering?

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It seems that each time I turn the tele on it merely reverberates with gloomy and ominous sound bytes that none of us can do sweet FA about. As far as I can tell no one really has any idea on how to fix it other than trying to stimulate the economy by punching dollars into it. However, it appears governments are fighting a losing battle considering consumer confidence is being manipulated daily with media heralding the message that we’re on a sinking ship and to prepare the lifeboats before we drown in economic collapse. I mean what the fuck  😕 It doesn’t make sense.

Are we supposed to spend or save? On the one hand we’re given the message that the economy depends upon consumer expenditure while on other, the message is loud and clear, your job may not exist tomorrow. The Doom Sayers tell us to save and the economists are telling us to spend. Well if they want to stimulate the economy why tell us that in a few months there’ll be mass lay off’s and we’ll be in the grip of a deep dark recession?

So we’re on the edge of precipice, wavering on the point of falling, the abyss glaring menacingly below. What do we do? Jump? Run? Hide? How about we stare straight down and call it’s bluff? It seems to me that we’re in recession only because we say we are. It’s self fulfilling prophecy. The shit hit the fan when someone called the bluff on the boom so why not engage in reverse psychology and call the bluff on doom? It’s absurd when we cast our minds back to what brought the whole economy to its knees. We were all intoxicated with how well things were going, no one batting an eyelid to the absurdity of trading on the future…

Haven’t we got the deal for you!

What is it?

Well this cheque is the future and it only costs one pound three pence a pop, guaranteed 100 percent return.

Fantastic give me a hundred thousand.

Done! Sold to the highest bidder *shit eating grin*


After going around the merry go round Mr X decides to cash his cheque FUTURE Not Negotiable

I’d like to cash this cheque mister bank manager.

Ok. Lets just punch this into the keyboard here…Err there seems to be a problem.

Oh. What is it?

Well this seems to be a blank cheque.

Yes that’s right. Its the Future and it is now worth Five Trillion Dollars. You can check it. It should be filed under Past Derivatives.

Ok that makes sense, let me just confirm with the issuer, Bank Z. *goes off to call Mister Y from Bank Z*

Ok Mister W unfortunately the issuer seems to have traded that cheque to another Bank, Bank P who then sold it onto Bank K and after then the paper trail seems to have been misplaced *looks rather worried and perplexed*

Very well then, *looks annoyed* if you would just be kind enough to cash the Future I bought and chase it up with Bank K I’ll be out of your hair.

No I’m afraid you don’t understand Mister W, we can’t cash that cheque because it appears to possess no value. The value was decided by the Past Derivative but the Future suddenly embarked upon another course and it appears the cheque you now possess is worthless.

Mister W storms off in search of his missing five trillion of non existent funds.
Well unfortunately the funds never existed so once the banks realised they’d been trading on non existent wealth the resultant predicament is the global financial crisis where we are now. The folly of it is the boom we came out of was a fraud. The money was fake, but for some reason we have disconnect because we seem to believe the recession isn’t. But if the recession is based on false economy I fail to see why the recession can’t be viewed with the same logic. We are in recession because the future was sold at too high a price and now we have to wait for the future to catch up to the past. Now if we sold the recession to the future and traded it for the past we should come out even.

Make sense?

Category : Rants | Blog

Phenom 2

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Well my stimulus package has already been spent! Half of it anyway. On a whim, Sunday, I went down to the local MSY store (not so local considering I have to drive 20 or so minutes) to buy a new processor. My AMD 9500 Phenom just wasn’t cutting it any more and wanted a new Phenom 2 to give my system a little boost. By using an Intel 2.5ghz Xeon quad at work I felt I was missing out on something and my home PC seemed like such a slug compared to my work PC , enough to make any tech-head cry from envy. Although my initial idea was to get a Phenom 920, MSY didn’t have any stock so what was I supposed to do? Like any compulsive spender I just super sized it and went for the Phenom 940, which they did have in stock. No matter the $60 price increase for 200Mhz – I fulfilled my desire and isn’t that how society works? I did try and dissuade myself from buying it – taunting my desire with questions like “Do I really need this new hardware?”…”Is it really necessary?….Fuck no, it’s not necessary, nor do I need it but I wanted it….Isn’t that reason enough?

And boy does this thing fly. I love this processor. This speed is what I’ve been waiting for, my whole life has accumulated to the moment when I could drop a 3Ghz processor into my slot. The moment of perfection, the crystallising moment of  creation where “The Wow Starts Now”. Okay it wasn’t as dramatic as all that but my dick got hard – okay that’s not true either but I was impressed by the responsiveness so the instant gratification I craved was satisfied. Besides it was a present to myself for being a good boy. Five years of being good after many years of being bad is good enough reason to celebrate with a splurge on new tech.

I just did a quick bench test and this beast shaved a good sum off super-pi from the best score I got from the Phenom 9500, which I think was 34 or 35 seconds but normally 43 seconds.

Super-Pi Mod 1.5

Super-Pi Mod 1.5

Category : Rants | Blog

The rubber morality

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Last week saw the Pope once again meddling with things he has no fucking idea about. Urging AIDS ridden Africa to dispense with condom use is an absolutely vile abuse of power. How did sex ever become a sin? And how did contraception become a greater sin? It’s absurd and downright insidious and the sooner the world rids of this atrocious belief that the Pope somehow speaks for God the sooner will the world be a healthier and safer place.

It boggles the mind how these clowns come up with such prohibitions. We probably can guess why they concoct fabrications of such nonsense – not because they truly believe that condom use is the downfall of morality and the fastest path to hell or that it offers no protection against sexually transmitted disease but because the controversy keeps the church from fading into distant memory. What better way to gain publicity than by throwing an outlandish proposition into the public domain knowing full well that it will sell news and thus keeping the catholic meme alive when it should have died with the last witch put to the stake. Seriously, are we really supposed to entertain the Pope having anything resembling sense when the institution he represents believed that witches existed and then burnt them for flying on broom sticks? Come On!

Why do people heed the “commandments” of some vain idiot in a hideous robe, who clearly is living with a 16th century infantile mindset? Wake up, this is the 21st century and the time for childish religiosity is well and truly over. One can only wish that there exists a God who is enthroned in heaven, so that when judgement time arrives, we the people can then be juried upon the trial of God’s men who speaketh vile instructions that enhance only their power stranglehold on the meek of mind and stupidly superstitious. If it wasn’t bad enough that the gullible believe that wearing a condom is a sure fire path to everlasting torment in the depths of Hell, what sort of God permits His name to be invoked by clergy who peddle this rubbish?

It’s entirely okay for the Pope lay claim to spiritual matters about the ethics of rubber, that isn’t the real issue, because in the end, who cares about the opinion of some antiquated fool? The issue lies in the power that such a figure holds over the people of the Catholic persuasion and the fact that these people all too often have influential positions and are all too ready to lay lives on the line over the absurd morality of rubber. The absolute folly of having the steadfast moral opinion that rubber is evil, to hold the opinion that AIDS victims are deserving of the disease because they succumb to purported “sin”, is that love in humanity is lost over abstract notions of some higher order law that makes no sense.

In a perfect world, yes, abstinence would be an ideal solution but we don’t live in a perfect world and we never will. Sex is not a sin, it is normal human activity, a natural phenomenon. Humanity evolved to a place where we can make choices about when we procreate and when we feel pleasure. This is not a sin! This is exactly how nature intended it to be, if it is not then we wouldn’t have the choice to begin with. We can make moral judgements about nature but it cares little for absurd notions of right and wrong. The sex drive will overcome the hell fire of a non existent afterlife pretty much most of the time, of course there will be a few who choose celibacy but this is the exception rather than the rule. Having the opinion that we should live according to some higher standard or moral definition while refusing to accept reality is sheer lunacy. The fact remains, people are going to have sex and ignoring this fact and relying on fear-mongering to rectify something which doesn’t fit neatly into a idealised world view is a recipe for disaster.

As individuals we have a choice and no one will take exception to one’s own belief that condom use is the root of all evil but when public policy is manipulated by the choice of individuals over the rights of other individuals we are essentially treading into dangerous territory and if the church becomes entangled with the state then what eventuates is theocracy and we know what happens when the god squad  gain an upper hand – smoke begins to bellow at the stake.

Category : Rants | Blog


Posted by Comments Off on Stimulus

Well I received my stimulus package from my boss today. A recession buster pay rise! Couple that with the Rudd Government package we’ll be receiving in the coming months and I’m all set to save the world from the wretched bankers who have fucked it all up. It’ll all come down to average Joe and his Mrs to pull us out of the total financial disaster the bankers have rewarded us with, for all the exorbitant fees and charges we’ve so apathetically handed over for the honour of remaining in perpetual debt. I’m rather sceptical about all the stimulus handouts, so we get $900 cash to spend on some more excess and it will do what exactly?

For one weekend all the stock will be cleared from Hardly Normal and JB HI-FI, then what? We’ll be back to square one. Sure the stock will have to be ordered in again and China will clear out a couple million LCD’s from their warehouse stock but it’s hardly going to demand Chinese Manufacturer’s to jump with joy and frantically plan for more plants to be built. So one can only wonder if this new cure all word “Stimulus” is going to simulate anything more than cynicism.

Of course the voter buying potential is more than enough incentive for Government handouts but lets get a little real and just acknowledge the fact that we’re screwed regardless. Unless the ones that fucked us over in the first place are prepared to unloosen their purse strings then a Kevin37 is just window dressing to appease the masses from total upheaval when the shit really hits the fan.

The banks are the only entity that can stop the collapse – they created the mess and until they become willing to hand out more debt then no more money will be available and the big boys who drive the economy rely on credit to get things moving. When they are cashed up and ready to invest in the building of some multi million/billion dollar infrastructure and the steel mills are pumping out processed iron ore by the mega tonne then Average Joe feels all safe and sound with his accumulating debt – the economy grows. But since the bankers have no fucking idea who they can trust, they tighten their arses tighter than a frogs so X Construction can’t get the few million to buy next weeks concrete. It just stops. Then Average Joe gets nervous, his job is going out the door along with the trip down to Chong’s Chinese family dinner on Friday night let alone that new Home Theatre package at Harvey’s. The Chinese get worried and cut back and so it goes…. no more natural resources are needed…. so our mining goes out the door with the over priced rentals in WA. Down it all goes. So is $900 going to save us from being sucked down into the abyss that the Banks have opened up for us?

So we wait. That’s all we can do. Wait for the Pin Stripe suit brigade to clean out the cupboards and await for the return of their enthusiasm to print money to begin anew.

Category : Rants | Blog

All Day I Dream About Sex

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Sex is on the minds of Australians and a new paradigm announced, out with closed feminist legs and in with a rigid formula of Nike Sex. Just do it.  Bettina Arndt has caused a stirring in the nether regions of media sensationalism with her new book The Sex Diaries. Some are outraged, others rejoicing and yet others, relieved that it’s perfectly normal for married couples to be depraved in sexual discourse or is that deprived of intercourse. Meh. Who fucking cares. Sex is just for reproduction so it makes perfectly good biological sense that the drive for sex in long term relationships starts to wane in preparation for some more meaningful sex – with another partner.

Evolution by natural selection. Darwin would be happy that adultery is now a legitimate contemplation of any sex starved spouse. Natural selection has designed us to mix up the gene pool and having multiple sexual partners can only assure a good mix. Now that Bettina has examined the sexual diaries of Australia’s most sexually frustrated we can continue dreaming about the sex we probably won’t get if we are married. Who can blame the unfaithful who merely seek the sexual gratification that marriage has taken away and who are unlikely to add any great genetic variation if an accidental conception occurs in the loveless comfort of marital numbness. We really don’t need any more ADHD  kids filling the classroom with maladaptive behaviour because Ma and Pa are too wound up in sexual tension to give the attention these hyperactive offspring crave, who invariably end up being the victims of the dry sheets in Mum and Dads bed.

Of course I’m being obnoxious and more than a little crass in my distaste of Bettina’s grab for fame. It’s old news now and although the headline on yesterday’s SMH’s website did compell me to read with curiosity, why a broadsheet newspaper was abasing itself with below the belt news, I just didn’t have the mindset to blog about it yesterday. I did start late last night after being reminded again of it on Lateline yet I was too brain-dead to continue. So I’m behind the eight ball and to make up for it I’m filling this page with useless and base opinion that is merely trying to shock with offensive drivel.

However, I do have a vague belief in what I’ve said. And it is probably why I’m single. As I see it, the only real benefit of a relationship is sex. It’s politically incorrect I know, but for me it is the truth. If there was no sex or hope for sex would you invest valuable time in cooing that babe with luxurious dinners and long conversations about nothing? Any male can deny it till there blue in the face but I know they’re lying. Sex. Sex. Sex. But it dries up as the sex diarists give testimony to and why I’m ranting about this non issue and as the discussion perhaps ends with, if no sex then what? Resentment? Anger? Frustration? Boredom? Dreams of happily ever after? It’s like an Ex girlfriend once accused me of…”Sex is just a means to an end”…of course I had to deny it at the time because I wanted more, so telling the truth was out of the question, but in my head the answer was undeniably a Yes. Yes sex is a means to an end. What else is it? Sure there is the closeness. There is the oneness. But in the end it’s about the orgasm. I have to be honest. Yes sex is a means to an end. That is what nature intended, to cum and have babies. If it didn’t feel good would you do it to just have babies?

Perhaps I’m immature and have entirely the wrong perception of sex but still the idea of having sex just to be close and share an intimate moment without an orgasm or pleasure just doesn’t seem all that appealing. I’m male – that’s the problem. Sex to me is uncomplicated, you’re horny and have a romp to feel pleasure – it serves a function but for some reason a lot of women don’t see it the same way. The early days are easy I guess, but as time moves forward in a relationship you have to work harder and harder and at some point it gets too hard that it just becomes a chore and probably why the marital bed is so dry.

Well at least I don’t have to worry about all the stresses of relationships, staying single is the key to lazy and uncomplicated living. I share the sex drought but with an easy conscience that alludes the couple.

Category : Rants | Blog