I’m being stalked by some random guy who has decided to make me his pet project. I stupidly opened the door to this churchy type and had a friendly conversion but I’ve opened Pandora’s box! Every weekend he seems to come knocking to see if I’m home. Luckily I was out last weekend so I missed him. Nevertheless he left me a Church pamphlet under my door with a hand written invitation for me to attend church on Sunday.

I must have been mad when I first chatted with him and had I known I’d be stalked, I would’ve been a little more discerning. I certainly would not have been so friendly. But what’s done is done and now I have to scheme a plan to get rid of him. He piqued my interest if I am to be honest and he seemed friendly enough. But is it a case of looks being deceiving, for all I know he could be a total nut case!

Anyway it makes me curious as to why someone feels compelled to knock on doors espousing a belief and touting it as the one and only truth. Why is it only particular creeds that feel it necessary to harass neighbourhoods with proselytising? Does anyone ever convert because some random knocked on their door?

He gave me a Bible because one of my complaints was that the Bible is so hard to read. I have the King James version and although I’ve read bits and pieces of it, I find it hard going. Due partly to the way it’s written but more truthfully,  because I don’t believe it and so seems pointless to expend time on something disinteresting. So I now have some modern version and it is no better, I still don’t possess an openness to receive the gift of salvation, namely because I think it’s absurd and silly to believe such things.

I was told to start with Mark and I started reading but it holds no appeal to me. It’s just words on paper written in what seems to not be any particular sequence and in somewhat fragmentary pieces. I would like to read the whole thing, one day, but it requires a concerted effort in concentration and focus to complete. A time consuming endeavour and one that isn’t particularly enjoyable. But are any history texts ever really an enjoyable read? Because that is what the Bible represents or so we are led to believe, that it is a document describing the history of Jesus and all the prophets and martyrs before him.

I can understand why religion appeals to people but to claim every word in a piece of text is the absolute truth and that one need only suspend disbelief is not so appealing to someone who wants to just know what the truth just for truths sake, without appealing to extraordinary supernatural phenomena to gain it. Is it reasonable to believe that the laws of physics can be arbitrarily suspended just for the sake of stirring devotion? Do religious people truly believe every nuance and miracle recorded in the pages of the Bible? Or is religious belief just a way to commune with one’s fellow human beings? Is it just a social club or does one truly have to believe literary that a Man rose from dead, or that a man built an ark to house millions of species? Or that Jesus walked on water, made the blind see and lame walk? Or that a man lived in a whales mouth for three days? 2000 years ago these things were perhaps believable but in the 21st century is it still possible to believe such things as the literal truth? And if they aren’t meant to be taken literally then what are we to make of it?

So having someone proselytise by door knocking may seem quaint but is it anything more than them expressing a desire to have their own existence validated in some way? I think the real reason why I naively opened myself up to this experience was because I was feeling lonely at the time and it was kind of nice having someone show a level of concern even if it was based on a deception. I’m not going to convert and he is unlikely to offer friendship without conversion. I could be wrong but the randomness of meeting is not some divine intervention but rather two egotistical entities colliding for a moment. There are two agendas that are not compatible. On the face of it, the need for belonging is a basic human desire so perhaps on rare occasions, when someone is vulnerable and alone there is a possibility that such clashes of ego be mutually beneficial but this random event is probably not one of them.

Still it’ll be a curious how this little synchronicity pans out and how long my stalker will stalk before he realises that it’s a lost cause. I somehow doubt he’ll ever see things in the exact same way as I see them nor will I be likely to adopt his point of view. But stranger things happen and we both may walk away with something interesting anyway.

Category : Journal

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