"I awoke one morning only to find the nightmare was real. Can this really be reality?" - TwistedTripper
This page and sub pages are a collection of bits and pieces from my fragmented consciousness, often filled with despair, hopelessness and a struggle to find a glimmer of sense to what all too often seems senseless. I hope to expand my interest in writing and although I often dream of doing the "Great Australian Novel" I seem to find excuses not to continue or become distracted with life's plethora of reasons why it's better to waste time than use it constructively. Come back here on occasion to see if any new stream of consciousness has been added.
Jyri
Inside corridors of thought there exists, a world, which some consider sick and depraved. I crawl through splintered cracks; the splintered cracks of a weathered window frame. Like an insect scouring through darkness, foraging for some relief; amidst stormy sleets of rain. Through ragged cracks all I see...is this cold, cold grey.
Grey which permeates the air; ashen smoke swirling from a cigarette, left alone to smoulder away. In earnest I endeavour to clear, the heavy burdening haze - the grey.
I'm afraid, so so afraid, that something terrible lurks; within the mist and that haze. I can feel it as it sifts through the air....I can hear it. Whispering. Rustling. Loathsome horrible sounds; sounds of maddening decay.
Come with me, I need to walk, to make an arduous journey through this decrepit grey. For I am lost and I cannot find my way.
Oft I wonder why, As time withers by. Why dost thou stare, at a faceless square?
All the long, long day; I watch. I wait. Like a sailors ship upon a silent bay.
All the while; the square, as an eternal fate, Returns my stare.
Realms of madness lurking within. Deafening silence. Emptiness. Corruption of scars, scenes from eons past. Bent disillusionment. Lies. Lies. Lies. Deceit echoing inside the dark.
Hardening...Hardened. Kill me! Screams my heart. Alas no one can hear, deafened by the rabble, charading as... As what? Society? whispering in my ear; this cannot be.
Rulers ruled by the rule. Straight and narrow as with the spear. Arrows and spears....flying across the wind. Aimless and searching.Victim found and lost. Penetrated by the liar called Fear.
Fear wanders alongside the realms. Sure footed and opaque as she walks, upon clefts and ridges, She looks downwards to her abandoned home.
Creation without cause, to whence shall I direct my applause? God? lies? emptiness or deceit? Pull clear my folly. In the twilight, the fading sun.
Died upon the cross, twas never reborn. He died in vanity of our human cause. Misdirected arrows in God's garden of forbidden fruits. We suffer in the sea's deep abyss of blue.
Players in a riddle. Unsolvable. Bottomless riddle. A riddle from chaotic nothingness; to which we owe our despair.
Nothingness. Infinite black our return, to bliss. Our reward.
18 August, 2010, 12:13 am
I finally took the plunge and went loose with my snus and although I took my first pris with some trepidation, with my mind’s eye wild and gouged with the image that my mouth was soon to become awash with a mudslide of moist tobacco, blackening it with bits of Skruf Xtr Stark Lös while [...]
2 July, 2010, 4:47 pm
My first week and a half in the country of my ancestry – Finland. Already it’s been a full week, a week and a half spent doing pretty much nothing except eating and relaxing in amongst the forest on the shore of a beautiful lake. Eating extraordinarily good food and I can safely say Finns [...]
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